I don't know what the big deal is about waiting in line. Humans seem to get all bent out of shape when they have to wait more than two minutes for anything. It's like they feel entitled to be rushed through a queue, whether it be at a grocery store, fast-food restaurant, or a Carrot Top autograph signing.

Dummies aren't quite as impatient. Believe me, we know what it's like to stand around for hours and days on end. I once waited 2 weeks for Bob to realize that he had left me in a Burger Bonanza john by mistake. (That's a whole other story - one that still haunts me to the plastic core.)

Anyway, it seems that a certain Six Flags amusement park has taken America's love of line-hopping to a new low. Their new Halloween promotion allows "brave" customers to avoid the lines for a small price: the consumption of a live cockroach. MMMmmm. If I experienced hunger, then I'm pretty sure this would make my stomach turn right now.

The news of this promotion has already found some resistance (understandably so) among certain health officials. It also raises some questions about how far is too far when it comes to giving incentives using tasteless means. Are we becoming a culture of shock values? What's next - run over the dummy and get a free milkshake?

This dummy doesn't really care what people want to do with their spare time. Eat live cockroaches for all I care! I'm just not sure what I think about a company offering rewards for dares. That seems to be a slippery slope that lowers the cultural bar, rather than raises it.